Sad-ness

Blogging is a way to express yourself in words that you can't say it out to the one you intended to. Feeling all heartbroken right now, just like any other time that we quarrel. I guess for the rest of today, we wouldn't know what the others are doing. Typically, he will just think I'll go out party, drink, and then hooked up with some guys and forget about everything else. (Yeapz, that's what people think about me! ^^) Then, I'll be thinking he's out smoking and drinking his heart out and spending unnecessary money, and I got nothing to say about it.

Seriously, if 2 people are so insecure about each other, why do they still wanna hold on to something not solid? And end up, both crying over and over again, over the same thing, on every argument. I guess now, sorry don't mean anything anymore. All we do is to shoot at each others' words. It's too late to hold back on the feelings poured. 2 silly people do not appreciate each other. ^^

Everything seems so fake right now, even the way we talk to each other. Why? LOL! By the end of the day, the proplem is still me. Same ol', same ol'. I guess I was right to not start anything at the first place. But why did I ended up in the same mistakes I did before. Did we not tell each other what we want? But I guess I asked for the impossible (as usual...LOL). It's really difficult to find someone who is 100% to you. In my case, no one can give me 100% of their feelings, except my parents. It's always have to be shared. ^^

The stupidest thing is we both want each other so much that we're afraid to put in 100%. LOL! Which is a good thing, because it means we love ourselves more. When will all this heartache be over??...................